Thursday, 22 April 2010

The Journey to a Self Made Orgasm

I'm wondering today, how many orgasms per week one needs in order to feel fulfilled. Perhaps several each day, several an hour? Or are you a one-a-day man or woman? How do you choose to travel to this destination?

Even though I could orgasm daily, I choose not to. Why? I like to build up the anticipation.

My particular libido means that I require mental stimulation as well as physical. I feel that my orgasm is not merely a physical need but rather a release from erotic mental/emotional stimulation.

Oh sure, I get those times where I feel I simply have to cum, or else I'll explode. But for the most part, as long as I orgasm every three or four days, I am ticking along nicely.

I have had some comments from people not understanding my enjoyment of the week+ chastity while my new clit hood bar made my clitoris unavailable for stimulation. This delves into the fetish territory of chastity, which is the enjoyment (or not, I guess! but always consensual activity) of orgasm denial.

Chastity can involve teasing or not. You may wish to be fitted with (or fit to your parter) a female, or male, chastity device.

Personally I always like to remain in control, but I do have masochistic tendencies that run synonymous to my sadistic side. I'm particularly kinky!

This means that I will abstain from orgasms until the need is just touching intolerable, to really glean the most enjoyment from making the anticipation last. Building that sexual tension into a frenzy, either alone or by being teased by various lovely friends. You know who you are!

In the past, I have refrained from an orgasm for two years. This was with an ex who did not 'allow' me to have sex toys, plus I did not orgasm through sex with him. After months of denial, my libido all but died anyway, so the torturous agony wasn't there.

The trick is getting that balance between orgasming too much (in this context, as I can hear shouts of, 'you can't orgasm too much!') so that it becomes instant gratification, merely flicking a button (!), and not orgasming often enough so that your libido disappears and any chastity enjoyment along with it.

My lovely man is purely vanilla and does not participate in anything beyond mildly kinky. I feel that I would only be able to lightly touch upon chastity play with a woman anyway, one that I trust and who I could give myself over to sexually, in the bedroom only, for fun.

For the most part, I tease myself to a point of needing to climax. Whether wearing butt plugs for a while, a love egg along with it or simply edging almost to climax then stopping, with a bullet, or just some lube and fingers... I enjoy the long drawn out journey to orgasm more than simply a race to the finish line.

This delicate weaving journey, alongside erotic mental stimulation (filthy talk, role play etc) and romantic tangible accoutrements mean that the final release is so much more fulfilling. Your entire soul is caught up in the pure delights of the moment, rather than simply ending the frustration of the nerve endings.

How do my readers feel about this, I wonder? Do you masturbate simply to end that need, as often as possible? Or do you enjoy the tease along the way?

What is the most fulfilling route to orgasm for you? Think about it, then comment below!

Have fun & stay sexy, blog angels!





  1. How I envy You! Able to orgasm as and when You wish! Sighs...

  2. You keep writing all these really good blog posts that make me feel like I should write my own blog post as a response. I can't keep up! :P

    Another great post, my response to which would be impractical to write as a comment. I'll have to blog about my masturbation routine later.

  3. I wrote a response on my blog. I gave you a mention for inspiring me to write it :)

  4. Great post! I may steal this idea and do as Ecksvie and write my own response. :)

    For me, it depends. Some days I need the instant gratification, while other times I'll spend ages working up to a mega-orgasm. I think where I am in my monthly cycle has something to do with my preferences, because I have noticed a pattern. Around ovulation, I'm horny as hell and can't get enough. At other times, I can take it or leave it and it's harder for me to climax.

  5. Thank you for your comments, Ecksvie & Buzz on Vibes!

    I'll read your blog post now, Ecksvie :)

    BOV, I'm the same, always horny around ovulation and also just the day before I begin ...

    Thank for your comment, let me know when you have a post written up if you wish! xx

  6. Have you ever experimented with locking a guy up in a chastity device?


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